October 7th Remembered

It has been two horrible years since the Palestinians showed the world the truth of who they are. Did the world listen? No. In fact, many in the world who did not know a Palestinian from a Pomeranian have found October 7th a good reason to join themselves together with the Palestinian cause. It’s like marrying a war criminal after you know what he did. It’s like marrying Genghis Khan or Adolf Hitler after their barbarity was revealed. Yes, there were those who did that but, you can have them because payment is your soul. Anyone supporting Palestine should be forced to watch the October 7th movie in the conditions that the hostages have had to endure for the past two years. That would be perfect justice.

For two years now, I have avoided watching any full length compilation of what occurred on October 7, 2023. I knew that I already supported Israel and I have told everyone who knows me. I decided to support Israel because of my reading of scripture. I have spent time studying this topic and it is clear that the Jews are God’s chosen people. Everything done by God is done with meaning and for a purpose. 

I understand that I, as a Christian, have been grafted into a sort of Judeo-Christian tree. As is so with grafting there is a main plant, in this case the Jewish people, and then there is the limb grafted on which in this case are Christian believers. God chose the Jewish people to be given the law and to begin the journey towards redeeming the world (through Jesus who came into the world as a Jew) from the ravages of sin and its’ consequences. That is immense but also full of danger as Satan has put the Jewish people in the crosshairs. He does not want this story told or fulfilled but, God will prevail.

Of course, I watched snippets of the film which emerged in news sources as this story unfolded. The footage showed women hanging dead and exposed off the back of trucks, or lying raped to death on the ground. I heard recordings of young men bragging to their parents about all the Jews they had killed too and their parents beeming with pride over their sons’ accomplishments. But, I kinda had my hand in front of my face as I did this or I only half listened because it was such an ugly side of life that I did not want to expose myself to it. I felt like a coward!

I was aided in this because no one that I knew really wanted to think too much about it either, except a Jewish lady that I know from Brooklyn. She is terrified for her own and her families safety in a borough of New York that was suddenly showing so much hostility towards Jews that it kinda made her feel like she lived in pre-world war II Berlin. She was emotional as she recounted how her neighborhood was plastered with posters and messages of support for the Palestinians and Jews were being harassed. It’s been two long years since this blot on the world’s reputation has occurred and I wonder why the world has chosen the wrong side in this fight between good and evil. 

What could I do to remember such a tragic day? I started to pray for all those still suffering from the aftermath of these horrific attacks. I prayed for healing of their bodies and minds. I prayed for God’s intervention and to use world leaders in this vein. I prayed for people to seek the truth of this story. Next, I decided I will have to go to a local bookstore, after I get my slow-cooker meal going, and see if they have the book “Hostage” by Eli Sharabi. It is due to be released today in the United States. It is the story of his kidnapping on October 7th and the unimaginable torture and treatment that Eli had to endure. 

I wonder if they will choose to have this book on their shelves because in doing so, it might create a political fire-storm. They might quietly, (lest any of their other customers hear), say they can order it for me and that it can be delivered to my house). They might even have a look of disgust on their faces as they tell me that. I do not want a delivery in secret, I want to see a Jew telling his side of the story allowed in their bookstore. That is what would be meaningful. This book was the fastest selling book in Israeli history. I believe that is the case because it is their October 7th story and as such is a worthwhile place to learn more.  

I want to see a bookstore with the courage to allow this hostage to tell his story. Will they or won’t they have the book? I think the odds are against it. The bookstore has recently undergone a dystopian, woke makeover. They have started to have a lot of gothic, occult books and events. They have more books by liberal authors. They have graphic novels and stupid books just perfect for the dumbing down of the masses. Nothing thought provoking just a constant loop and repetition of the liberal mantras that need to be reinforced: anti-God, anti-capitalist, anti-men, and climate change blah, blah, blah. I miss freedom and I want it back. So, I will let this independent bookstore know where I stand and that I will vote with my dollars.

I also decided that I had to see the October 7th film and begin to read all the documents that have been uncovered concerning the planning of the massacre. It was said that the Nazis of Germany were good record keepers, well so were the Palestians. Did they learn it from Hitler? There was that whole Jerusalem Mufti and Hitler meeting. I can not help but wonder because there were many copies of “Mein Kampf” in the Arabic translation found in Gaza. 

I am hoping that my readers in the United States and around the world will take the time to pray for the victims of the October 7th massacre. Pray for healing in both mind and body. Pray for average people and our leaders to have moral clarity and act accordingly. I am asking you to have the courage to see at least snippets of the October 7th film. The world has been blocking traffic, protesting in the streets of many countries and on various college campuses so, it is important to know the truth of what happened that day to understand what is at stake. For documentation go to: October7files.com for a 20 minute film on October 7th google “Amir Tsarfati October 7th unfiltered”. It is very hard to watch. I do not recommend this if you are infirmed in any way. Go to a bookstore wherever you are today or in the next couple of days and ask for the book “Hostage” by Eli Sharabi. I am praying that the world’s leaders who have already begun to support a plan to end this war would move forward together with that plan. 

Christian Housewife Reviews “Eden”

Eden, is an idyll that always keeps coming back into our philosophical musings. It is the concept of the perfect human habitation. What comes to mind for you when I say the word “Eden?” Lush, beautiful nature scenes, harmony, or eternity perhaps? Writers and poets are always drawn to the topic of Eden as they endeavor to contemplate mankind’s origins, potential and the human condition.

Eden is the perfect place that God created for us that is mentionned in the first book of the Bible. It was a place where God and mankind had a perfect harmony. (Adam walked with God in the cool of the evening). Everything needed for our physical sustenance was all around us and it was for free. We could eat and drink and have our fill. 

Famed director Ron Howard was inspired to make the movie “Eden” after visiting the Galápagos Islands. One of the islands in the Galápagos Island chain is named Floreana. In stark contrast to the enchanting stories of finches and giant tortoises, the story of Floriana is a bit more sordid. I wondered if Ron Howard was having some sort of midlife crisis since this movie did not match the usual fare that I have come to expect and enjoy from the directorship of Mr. Howard.

He tells stories of people in crisis. Whether it is in outer space or in mental illness, those stories represent mankind’s greatness, struggles and they usually end with the ultimate victory over challenges. I always feel happy after his movies. So, why was he delving into a mysterious murder in the tropics, I don’t see Opie* that way. 

You may wonder why I would choose to do a movie review as opposed to cover the spiritual battles of the world as it goes through paradigm shifts, wars, natural disasters, and spiritual confusion? Could it be that I need a break? Maybe. But, you already know me better than that. I can’t just watch any movie can I now? No, I have to go and watch a grossly under-appreciated and overly philosophical movie and then ponder it. 

Here I go again. The film Eden has a lot to say about our out of control societies and the development of a new world order. In other words, it has relevance for us today. The movie “Eden” is based on real events that transpired in the late 1920’s. It tells the story of three ex-pat groups that purposely stepped away from the civilization that they knew to start all over again on an uninhabited island. 

What were they looking for and does the idea have any appeal to you at the moment? To begin with, Dr Friedrich Ritter was practicing medicine in 1920’s Germany. He was enamored of the philosophy of Friedrich Nietzche and one of his patients who had multiple sclerosis. He believed he was going to advance the work of Nietzche and develop a template for the next stages of the human journey. This would change the world. Hitler had that idea too. There is the hint that his lover Dore Strauch will find health giving aspects on this island Eden. Theirs was a relationship of a most unconventional nature. But, anything goes on this island.

Then there are the Wittmers, a family comprising a hard-working World War I German soldier who was disillusioned with post World War I Germany. His first wife had died, his son had tuberculosis and his life as a middle class bureaucrat did not afford him the luxury of being able to afford treatment for his sick son. Could “Eden” be a healing place for his son? His second wife Margaret starts out as a character just along for the ride until she becomes pregnant and must deliver the baby under harsh conditions thus bringing out some motherly warrior instinct. 

Then there is the character who is looking to be the queen bee of the island. She’s as bad as she wants to be and doesn’t hide it. Like a queen bee she is in charge, sexually active with all the male (drone) bees and trying to build something, in this case a luxury resort. 

The events in 1920’s Europe seemingly inspired the formation of the characters and their decision to dramatically step away from the society, the family and the life they had once known. Yet they brought their philosophies with them and begin to build the same problematic world on Floreana that they had left behind. Ideas of the next stages of humanities progress were all around them and the desires of a new world order were afoot and each character reflects this in one way or another.

At that time, the ideas of Marx, Nietzche and Sartre among others were being mined as a source for societal change. The discontent, the longing for a perfect world was palpable everywhere.The Russians had tried to make their perfect utopia in their Revolution of 1917 with its’ desire to bring the masses to full equality and into the modern age. What befell the Russians in search of that utopian dream is deep and dark and they still have not emerged from the disaster of that utopian dream. 

Some of those ideas of Utopia would cause those in Germany to imagine a solution to their post World War I economic problems. The next World War would see the quest for the perfect world played out and ensconce the entire world in the process, Japan and its’ imperial history, the Arabs moving towards independence, the Italians with socialism and the United States who would have to make decisions about continuing in isolationist tendencies. All would be effected.

The high-rolling stock markets, music and flapper culture of the 1920’s did much to inform the character of the Baroness in this movie. The intellectual cauldron, and the social unrest all were at play when three groups decided to stop the current trajectory of their lives and start anew in their quest to create their own version of Eden. The problems started immediately. Don’t they always? Doesn’t anyone read the Bible anymore because the quest for utopia always plays out the same way. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome.

As King Solomon opinied, “there is nothing new under the sun” and this movie surely confirms that thought. Russia is doing the same old thing with Ukraine. The North Koreans are trying to have their own version of Eden and the Chinese just keep pushing their principles forward, no matter how wrong they are. They have been doing this for a very long time. According to the Bible, they will continue what they are doing until they will reach the disastrous end stage of mankind’s perpetual revolving door of insanity. It is caught like some planet in an orbit of destruction where it will eventually crash and burn. Don’t believe me? The rejection of God’s law did not bode well for Adam and Eve. The Russian Revolution whose godless regime tried to replace God with the state epically failed. 

Each of the islanders thought they would win too. Their particular versions of utopia conflicted with each others and a fight soon ensued for their beliefs and the scarce resources (this seems like what is happening today doesn’t it). The fight for survival whether it was in their European homeland or on an uninhabited island can not be overcome through wars, murder or manipulation. The island of Floreana, as depicted in this movie soon became a mini-United Nations with seemingly ridiculous and yet imperative conflicts breaking out. In this story, those differences end in murder, treachery and a fall from Eden. 

It’s always the same. This movie and the events that occurred in 1929 in no small ways seem to mirror events that are currently occurring on the word stage. There is one instant of male frontal nudity, a sex scene and a lot of lovemaking noises comes through tents but, it is all so distasteful that it’s enough to make you return to a more Christian model of sexuality. I choose to follow Jesus and this movie and the dysfunction that I see in the world helps me to realize that this is the best choice. “Commit your way to the Lord, Trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass.”- Psalm 37:5 

❤️❤️ God bless you. 

* Opie is a childhood role that Ron Howard played on the “Andy Griffith Show.” 

A Turning Point?

The world is struggling or is it just me? I have had a rough week with so much murder and mayhem in the news. It all comes down to the spiritual battle in our hearts. 1 Kings 18:21- (the prophet Elijah asked the undecided people) How long will you falter between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow Him; if Baal, follow Him.” But the people answered him not a word. 

Just where are we heading in this next stage of human existence? What will the meaning of our lives be when artificial intelligence takes over a lot of our jobs? I think we better have a plan for that eventuality, don’t you? What are we to make of all the latest crazy worldwide events? This is a test so you better get the answers right if you want to graduate!

“I will bless those who bless you, and I will curse him who curses you; and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed”- Genesis 12:3.                                                                                                        

The United Nations overwhelmingly voted to create a Palestinian State. A what? Land that the Roman Empire named Palestine as an affront to the Jewish peoples will now officially be divided? The problem is that God gave that land to the Jewish nation. Also, didn’t the United Nations speak about this after World War II by creating Jordan as a homeland for the Arabs and Israel to finally be recognized for what it had been for thousands of years i.e. the homeland of the Jewish people? The majority of land in the Middle East belongs to the Arab and Iranian people but, not this little spit of land. The good news is that the ten nations that voted against the partition of Israel and the twelve nations that abstained from voting will be blessed. The bad news is that one hundred and forty two nations will begin to come under God’s curse. 

Joel 3:1-4-For, behold, in those days, and in that time, when I shall bring again the captivity of Judah and Jerusalem, 

I will also gather all the nations, and will bring them down into the valley of Jehoshaphat, and will plead with them for my people and for my heritage Israel, whom they have scattered among the nations, and parted my land. 

And they have cast lots for my people; and have given a boy for an harlot, and sold a girl for wine, that they might drink. 

Yea, and what have ye to do with me, O Tyre, and Zidon, and all the coasts of Palestine? Will ye render me a recompense? And if ye recompense me, swiftly and speedily will I return your recompense upon your own head.

Aren’t terrorists getting rewarded for doing a civilian massacre on October 7, 2023? This Hamas massacre also included the plan to use rape and hostage torture as part of their strategy? Technically isn’t that an international war crime? Is this the best the United Nations can do about that situation? They are a morally failed institution. Not to mention how they have not settled the Russian-Ukrainian War. What are they even good for?

China has so many people that it is very easy to whip up a military parade to show the world its’ intentions. We had Russia, China, India and North Korea all joining hands in a grand show of friendship at that event. I think we all got the message. Russia, invaded Ukraine and, as of late made incursions unto Polish and Romanian airspace. Note: any accident that the Russians chose a moment after the Chinese pow-wow to insult Polish and Romanian airspace and then do a military exercise on their border? I think not. These countries are forming a partnership for certain but is there any honor there?

Let’s start with North Korea. The North Koreans are hunkered down in some cult-like isolation chamber experiment. In complete isolation from the rest of the world the only thing we know about them comes from the occasional person lucky enough to escape its’ clutches and tell their story to the world. From there it is often a harrowing journey towards wellness for people so brutalized. Ruling by fear and psychological manipulation keeps people in lockstep to the Kim family tempo. I don’t want to live that way, do you? India, Russia, China: show me your friends and I’ll show you yourself! Do not be misled:”Bad company corrupts good character”- 1 Corinthians 15:33

The above countries all benefit from this alliance in many ways. Russia gets soldiers from North Korea. I can’t imagine how terrible that soldier’s assignment would be or maybe I can. India and China are getting great energy deals on the backs of a wronged Ukrainian population who have always been menaced by the Russian Bear. Maternity wards and preschools have been bombed and while Russian children go back to school many Ukrainian children will be studying in underground shelters. Those Ukrainian children lucky enough to not get kidnapped for re-education in Russia. China’s and India’s cheap energy comes with a bloody price. China and India should not be helping finance Russia’s war. 

And could it be that even Europe is bowing to Russia in exchange for that cheap energy? If they support Ukraine as much as they are always saying they do, couldn’t they just buy energy from the United States or Israel?  Europe is paying for its’ impractical environmental policies and now they can not meet their own energy needs. Europe has an identity crisis too. Judging by recent protests around Europe, there are many Europeans who know that the mass migrations that have flooded their lands will destroy their identity and more. 

However, the leaders in charge don’t seem to be listening or care. Europe hounded and cruelly mistreated the Jews in their historical past and they seem to be back to their old ways of Jew-hating judging by their recent vote at the United Nations and divestments from Jewish business and cultural ties. It’s Europe being Europe and I thought they had outgrown this. All of the countries of the world have tried for greatness but instead have failed because we need God in our hearts, communities, and nations for any real progress. The kind of progress that the collective world’s heart really wants.

Then we have the cold-blooded murder of 31 year old Charlie Kirk. A husband, father, committed Christian and free speech advocate was assassinated on a college campus while answering questions on transgender violence only to became one of the statistics of that violence . He was killed by a gay man living with his transgender partner while advocating for biblical truth. He was killed for being a Christian. Killed for standing up for traditional values. Charlie Kirk exercised his right to free speech and was gunned down in the least free zone that exists in the United States today which happens to be the college campuses. 

Today the United States campus is a no-go zone for Christians and traditional people of any type. The grades and professionships are rigged in favor of Marxist thinking. Send in your scholars, and receive back professional agitators, anarchists, feminists and generally subversive individuals. Think Tyler Robinson or Luigi Mangione. It seems to be an epidemic and we have no one to blame but ourselves. We let insanity build and build until ka-boom, the revolution is here. We should have stood for something then but it is never too late.

What do you stand for? Charlie Kirk stood for something good and now he is gone because the democrats can’t tolerate people who don’t agree with them. They take life lightly and even joke and applaud the killing of political adversaries. They hate Christians. We most not hate them back. We must pray for people who persecute us. It is not easy to do this but, we must. Romans 12:21- be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.

Since Charlie Kirk died Christians, conservatives and republicans all over the United States have gathered for prayer vigils. What did democrats and their supporters do when George Floyd died? They looted, robbed and killed people. That’s what they always do. This cost one billion dollars in losses. The conservatives are praying. 

Newscasters have used their visibility to push forth their twisted views of life to their captive viewership. Thankfully, one has been fired. A liberal got fired for taking money and then refusing to print out prayer vigil posters for Charlie Kirk. A New Jersey nurse who reported a doctor for his gleeful and ghoulish comments is now the one getting in trouble. Of course she is in this world gone mad. I would not wish to be treated by this doctor because I think he could not carry out his duties to uphold life if the patient happened to be a conservative Christian. There is simply no respect for the dead or for people of faith.

Remember the shooting at Charlie Hebdo?  “Je suits Charlie.” That phrase may have new meaning. It may now mean that we will get off the sidelines and take the mantle of responsibility for everything that is going on. The things that Charlie Kirk was doing. Bring decency back to our communities, integrity back to our governments and Christ back in our hearts. Do it for God and in remembrance of Charlie Kirk.

Acts 2:21- And it shall come to pass that whosoever calls on the name of the LORD shall be saved.

Psalm 112:7-8- He will not be afraid of evil tidings; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. His heart is established; he will not be afraid, until he sees his desire upon his enemies.

Galatians 6:9- Let us not become weary in doing good for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

2 Corinthians 1:3- Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort.

The Green-Eyed Monster

I had a long text message exchange with a Christian friend on the topic of jealousy. My friend lives in Russia. Ever since the Russian invasion of Ukraine occurred we have not been able to see each other in person. Before the invasion, she was planning to spend a semester of her school year in the United States studying English as a foreign exchange student. Those dreams were dashed as international sanctions mounted against Russia after the war began. What a disappointment to Anya* to miss out on studying the English language in the United States. I was also sorely disappointed because I was looking forward to spending time with my Christian friend. I first met Anya on the Christian missions field serving those in need. The powerful bond that one forms in such a setting is not easily broken. 

The damage to lives and to international relations that Russia’s decision to invade Ukraine has caused are immense. On a microcosm we see the relationships that are interrupted, on a macrocosm we see families torn apart, lives lost, and the world facing a re-ordering. The Bible tells us what is to be next. It has all been foretold in the Good Book. 

However, getting back to that microcosm leads me to that text conversation with Anya that I mentioned earlier. I was sharing the story of a special moment recently enjoyed at my husband’s birthday party. My husband had just finished opening his birthday gifts when he asked me if I knew which was his best gift?When I modestly exclaimed “no,” he replied, “you,” are my best gift. It was one of those countless romantic moments that I have enjoyed over the years with my husband.

When I happened to mention this to Anya, she good-naturedly feigned “white jealousy.” I had never really heard the term “white jealousy” before but surmised it to be a small jealousy, just as a white lie is considered a small lie. From there, our text messages blew up and we were feverishly texting back and forth. As is my habit I first waxed poetic on the general human condition of jealousy. Here is some of our conversation:

ANYA: Actually, I believe that you are indeed *******’s best gift. Your husband is a naturally sweet and romantic man. I honestly sometimes envy you. In Russia it’s called, “cool white jealousy.” It is when you are glad that your friend or family member has something cool but at the same time you want it! “Black jealousy” is generally considered a flaw and a bad trait. It’s when you angrily think that if you don’t get it, nobody else should. 

Ivan* (Anya’s boyfriend) is not a romantic. It’s hard for him to open up that often, even in front of me or his own mother. However, he can be sweet and supportive when he feels you truly need him. Most of my boyfriends have not been romantic. I guess I am looking for other things. Ivan has a good sense of humor. It is very similar to mine, it’s both silly and serious. He is responsible and mature. He cares for his mother and other family members. He is handsome, and as big as a bear. Last but not least he’s intellectually gifted and in some ways his intellectual capacities exceed my own. I was looking for an equal.

ME: The topic of jealousy is an interesting one! What does culture say about it, and what does God say about it? Throughout the ages, the stories of people reflect the white and black jealousies that we go through. It’s one of those emotions that are quite uncomfortable (think Rachel and Leah). When it is white, it is under control and when it is black, jealousy can lead to crime (think Cain and Abel). The world’s cultures have sang songs about it, made operas and movies about it. Great writer’s have made jealousy the central theme of a deep study of humanity.

The Bible teaches us to let go of the feelings of jealousy and instead to realize that each one of us is loved by God equally. God specifically chose not to give any of us every gift for our own good. But, that leaves us knowing that someone else has something that we do not have and that often turns to jealousy.

God wants us to be happy for one another, for example when someone else gets a great job or marries well. When people work together combining their talents in a godly way, it makes the world a better place. 

ANYA: Jealousy is a common trait in the sport in which I compete. When you are competing, you sometimes wish that your rival performed worse than you because you want to win. When I win a gold medal, some of the other girls wish that it were they who had won instead. When some other girl takes the gold I wish that it were my victory….embarrassing but true. Can you relate?

ME: Of course I can relate. It takes time and consideration to work through my feelings of jealousy and I have done that and will continue to do that throughout my entire life. I love the German word “shadenfreude.” It perfectly expresses the worst part of jealousy which is being happy at someone’s misfortune. The meaning of that word makes me work hard at being happy for people because shadenfreude is quite ugly and represents the worst of me.

Shadenfreude is showcased often in social media. I have to “click off” when I see it lest I get tempted to go along with the sentiment.

ANYA: yes, the worst type of jealousy is when you find someone’s misfortune pleasant. I know that most people are like that sometimes. That’s pretty normal but you must keep it under control like you said. If you jealousy is controlled-it’s safe for you and others. 

I realize that the feeling of jealousy is often inevitable throughout our lives. It doesn’t necessarily mean we’re “bad.” White jealousy is not bad and it’s not poisonous. For instance, yes, I admit that I am a bit jealous of you. But, it doesn’t mean that I wish you the worst.

Me: The Bible says that we are all bad people, the consequence of the fall of mankind in the Garden of Eden. Our bad thoughts mean that we are bad people. It is what makes us a sinner. The only solution for sin is to admit our wrong and go to God for forgiveness, redemption and new direction. God is good to make our sin go as far away as “the east is from the West.” Next, if we allow it, God helps us to do better from year to year.

I have come to terms with the truth that I am both good and bad. Knowing Jesus means that he has my back. He has taken the price for that jealousy and other things that I have done. I am grateful that we have someone who has taken up our cause. 

Post Script: Clearly Anya is not looking for a romantic type of guy and it is other attributes that win her heart. So why did the Green-Eyed Monster emerge when I discussed a romantic moment? Well, why was I jealous when a friend told me about her Vermont summer cottage? I prefer to take different trips every year and not be tied down to one summer experience year after year. I’m an explorer. So why did I experience that uncomfortable emotion? Why indeed! 

Numbers 5:14 (KJV) And the Spirit of jealousy come upon him, and he be jealous of his wife, and she if defiled: or if the spirit of jealousy come upon him, and he be.

Proverbs 27:4 (NKJV) Wrath is cruel and anger a torrent. But who is able to stand before jealousy?

One more thing: *******’s romantic and has many wonderful attributes but just like Ivan he is not perfect. 

******’s- my husband. 

* the names are changed to protect privacy.

Wuhan/Foshan?

 In my Post-Op/Post-Game world I have had some time to catch up on the news. I started to wonder why the Chinese Government has launched an insane response to the Chikungunya virus outbreak in Guangdong province. This virus pops up in parts of Asia, South and Central America as well as Africa during the mosquito season. The disease is carried by the same mosquito that transmits dengue fever and the Zika virus. I have known people who have had all the above mentioned viruses. 

Mosquitos carry diseases that they are able to transmit when they give people those pesky bites during the summer months and we ought to guard against that and try to prevent that from happening. Part of my summer routines besides wearing flip-flops and linen a plenty is making sure there is no standing water on my property. I have always taken that job very seriously knowing that depriving the mosquitos from water during their breeding season is good science and goes far to prevent disease outbreaks. 

I have been on slo-mo since my gall bladder surgery so, I asked my husband to please walk around the property yesterday and to disperse any standing water that he finds. I know that we have a watering can which catches water under an air conditioning unit and we use that to water nearby summer blooms. We usually empty that frequently. However, since I have been ordered not to lift anything too heavy, I have to ask my husband to do it. Shoveling snow in the winter, and making sure there is no standing water on your property in summer is a responsibility.

I reminded my husband incessantly to inspect our property frequently as I nervously read varying accounts of the Chinese crackdown in Guangdong province concerning the recent virus outbreak. They have warned people that failure to handle standing water on property could result in steep fines or even shut-offs of a homeowner’s electrical power. Wait, that is going way too far.

I imagine that there is a Chinese lady out there who is right now trying to explain to the government official that she is recovering from gallbladder surgery and she is usually un top of that chore but, that she is currently not able to do it. Her husband has been so busy taking care of her that he is a little behind with a double load of responsibilities. Could you please put our electricity back on and rescind this fine? From all accounts the Chinese government are flying drones with A.I. intelligence assisting to find standing water. 

On the one hand, it seems like it should be a good and a quick way of identifying places where there is standing water which might be a breeding ground for mosquitos. Bravo right? On the other hand, now they are using it to spy on citizens in China and using information gathered to penalize people. The accounts from China are again reading like a dystopian novel. Shades of Wuhan/Foshan. 

Pharmacists are told to report people who purchase certain types of medicine. The government then goes on to require blood tests to check for the Chikungunya virus. Individuals who test positive for the virus are then taken to the hospital until their tests come back negative. They are placed under mosquito netting until then. Forced mosquito netting that sounds like my grandmother when I was visiting her in a tropical location. I do understand that if you have the virus and a mosquito bites you that the mosquito can then pass the virus that they got from you to the next person. However, as a moral person I would choose to take all due precautions to keep myself, my family and other people safe. Is it the governments job to hold me prisoner and take away my freedom before I do anything wrong? It’s almost as if they don’t trust their citizens. 

All over social media there is a story of a mother whose children were tested without her permission merely because she bought fever reducing medicine at a pharmacy. Imagine that, a child with a fever, let’s get the men in white coats….. not!

China has had a great deal of flooding and with that as their history shows disease breaks out in that region. Ten thousand people have gotten the virus this time. However, this disease usually does not kill anyone and while it does present a risk to those in certain categories, (we have to watch out for ourselves if we are in those categories), it usually results in an immunity and resistance the next time you get the virus. It’s like the model for today’s government and the medical community is never trust a person’s natural immunity. Why is that?

Since the Chinese introduced the world to the gain of function Wuhan virus, we see a new partnership between science and the government. Let’s be clear, it is never a good thing when medicine and government team up. It is better if medicine remains an independent entity with citizen input. Evidence the former Soviet Union’s weaponization of psychiatric medicine to punish political prisoners. Or, the Nazis sterilizing people who they deemed undesirable. What about the World Health Organization and various countries unwise measures used at combatting the corona virus? Wuhan/Foshan? 

I have read of genetically engineered elephant mosquitos being released to eat the disease carrying smaller mosquitoes. Mutant mosquitos, what could go wrong there? Or, what about obsessively spraying dangerous insecticides everywhere. I am now imagining pollinators dying, asthma increases in already polluted China and other environmentally lasting effects as the poisoned water and air complete their cycles and disperse the poison far and wide in the food chain. Coje la suave with that poison!

The tools of the modern computer era far surpass any past tyrannical model for control that has ever existed. The ability to completely and totally control every citizen’s life is now something that any government can easily implement. The information superhighway that we thought so much of is now tainted with the smear of deep fakes, algorithmic manipulation, hackers and artificial intelligence lies. The Chinese pandemic model is the new model of how world domination will occur. There is nothing good about their war on this virus. Don’t buy the hysteria or methods. Our rights come from God not from our government or the health care profession and we ought to have a say! 

P.S. pray, read your Bible, eat healthy, and exercise. In this summer of floods check for standing water and disperse it. Take precautions to avert mosquito bites at dawn and dusk. I use herbal sprays and homemade citronella candles. If need be and you live in an at risk location please use mosquito netting. Also, with vacation season still in progress it is important to check if your vacation destination has reported any recent cases. If so, it might be worth it to reschedule. God bless you all. 

Post-Op/Post-Game

 Hi Y’All. I am back. You didn’t get rid of me that easily. I made it through my gall bladder surgery. One of my centering scriptures was, Be still and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth -Psalm.46:10. In the not so distant past, I went to a German Fraktur lecture and bought several lovely examples of that calligraphy. I quickly framed them in neon green picture frames that I had bought at an Anthropologie store. One was the Psalm that I just referenced. It helped me to quiet my mind and nerves from time to time before the surgery. That verse is a life raft that we can all grab a hold of and contemplate. And as we contemplate its’ meaning, somehow everything falls right into place! God is in control folks.

After the surgery, another Fraktur calligraphy of the word “gratitude” was reflective for me. So many people reference the word “gratitude” in art work at their home or in their office. But, just who or what are we gratitude to and for? It matters. In life, there is so much gratitude that we should have of course. We should be grateful to our parents, our friends, mentors and others. However, first and foremost when I look at this lovely framed example of Fraktur I immediately know that I am thinking of God and all that he has done for me in the weeks and months before my surgery. I am grateful for the Holy Spirits’ presence now in my Post-Op/ Post-Game world too. In fact, when my surgery was over and the nurse informed me that it was all over. I remember feeling wide-awake and breaking out in a big smile. How happy I was as I exclaimed, “thank you Lord!”

It has now been one full week of recuperation and I had my Post-Op/Post-Game doctor’s appointment. They pronounced me on the mend and doing well. However, I love the way they give you the big sell on getting a surgery and then afterwards, they spring a whole bunch of life-long digestive problems that may ensue. Is it any wonder that people decry the medical profession or seek alternative medicine? While they are not a perfect institution, they are THE INSTITUTION to be beat and no one has yet. So, we have to deal with the system. On the day of the surgery, the team assembled to do my surgery treated me with dignity and respect. 

I thought that one of the downsides of moving out of Westchester County New York might be that I get worse medical care. After all, New York City area hospitals consistently rank high in industry wide comparisons. Having experienced treatment in those major facilities and coming along side others also getting treatment at these hospitals did not convince me of their often reported superiority. In fact the opposite. I felt that patients are often treated insensitively. There are language barriers when dealing with medical staff who did not score as high on language arts as they seemingly did in the medical sciences. At times it feels like calling a customer service line for some computer help and not understanding what the person on the other lines was saying. My parents were both born in other countries so English was their second language. However, communicating with excellence in whatever language we spoke was considered important. The care is spotty at best and depends on who is on duty that day. Wait times are horrific too. 

So, when I looked at the pros and cons of leaving my native state of New York, I did so with my eyes wide open. There always seems to be the sense that big city care is state of the art. But, what about quality of life and care? I began by praying to God to move to the place that he wanted me to be. I asked that he would guide and direct me to a place where I wasn’t the only Christian or conservative on my block. But, now that I had to get my first surgery I had to accept the choice that I made to move to a more remote location. What ended up happening on the day of my surgery was what I was hoping for i.e. a small town experience, my own personal Hallmark movie. Everyone looked me in the eye that day and communicated effectively about the procedure that I was about to undergo and my aftercare. I was educated and prepared for my surgery and recuperation. People treated me kindly and gently. Their techniques that morning seemed well-orchestrated. Most important to me, there were Christian scriptures on people’s desk, and on the walls. A conservative channel was playing on the television screen. Maybe I will live a couple years less here but, it is not how long we live, it is the quality of our life. I can breath here. I can be myself here. Thank you God for bringing me here, getting me through difficult things and please bless the people who cared for me that day. 

My First Time

It’s not what you think folks, it’s my first surgery and of course I have gone through a panoply of emotions. Surgery, no matter how simple can go wrong. Surgery can be simple or problems that the doctor did not anticipate can turn your life upside down. We all know instances when each possibility has occurred. It’s a good idea to be prepared for any eventually. We all know people who had a very straightforward surgery, wonderful recovery, and quality of life return immediately. 

Then, there are the people who die on the table. There are people like my friend Kerry* who went in for a simple procedure and then had a stroke. Now, what was supposed to be a quick process for Kerry has turned into months of rehab at a nursing facility. Or, there is my friend Maddie* whose husband somehow developed sepsis after his surgery. He did not have a will because he thought that it was a simple procedure and he would be fine.

My gall bladder surgery is scheduled to be a laparoscopic procedure. That is supposed to be the easiest option. The doctor anticipates sending me home that same day, unless as he says there are some unforeseen circumstances. We never know and in that lack of assurance there is that blessed assurance. Dr. Scholl* expressed confidence and told me a story about a recent patient just raring to go  one week after this surgery. This surgeon did not spend that much time with me explaining anything but he made sure to assure me that this surgery is the best thing since sliced bread.  His staff told me that gall bladder surgery is a great first surgery to have. What does that even suggest? Let’s not even think about that.

My family doctor said he thinks this is going to go well. Okay that’s good. Then there is my Pastor’s wife who told me that I might never be able to digest food properly again after the surgery. Oh Joy!Wow, my head is spinning. 

The nurse goes over every medical thing that has ever happened in my life. She talks of transfusions in an emergency and hands me power of attorney and living will forms. Gee, why do I even need that? What’s a Westchester Christian Housewife to think amid all the divergent messages? Obviously, this is what this blog is all about, God’s holy light that shines in the darkest and yet most ordinary moments that we have. If we live long enough, we will all have surgery. If I die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take.

As I lean into scripture, prayer and faith it’s crazy how many things are going wrong. The cut I get while using my British sewing scissors to craft leaves a nasty cut. Thank God it is healing quickly and will be complete before my surgery. My husband got bite by some unseen bug. It was bad. Plus, my Pastor’s wife comes to visit me again with yet more stories that seem to interject fear back into my equation of coping.

I have had some ups and downs lately. But, the whole thing started out slowly. I was starting to get some general symptoms every so often. They seem to escalate just as Leo’s (last blog post) ex-girlfriend situation was growing more grave. In looking back, I can definitely say that some gall bladder symptoms may have explained why I grew so inpatient with Leo. I just couldn’t deal with the high melodrama that his situation entailed when I started feeling poorly.

Now, three days before surgery I have to begin using antiseptic cleaner on my body to ready me for the surgery. The whole medical protecols are by their very nature so clinical and dehumanizing. Yet, in another way it encapsulates the true nature of our mortality. God is the opposite. Uplifting and eternal. I resolved to dig down into scripture.

Two days before the procedure it is a fog. There are moments or joy seeing the sea of purple shaded flowers overlooking a porch. There are moments of business before the surgery. Bills, cleaning, laundry, and stocking up on groceries. There are vague feelings that I may be getting a tension headache or tensing up before I try to just breathe and pray and work my feelings through. 

There is something about touching the truth of one’s own mortality that makes one live life more richly. Knowing that you will not be with your family and friends forever should spur one on to good deeds. But, without God it could spur one onto narcissism,(see last blog post). It is for each one of us to make a decision about how we should live knowing that our time on earth could be abruptly cut short. 

As a Christian, it has lead me to make a heartfelt apology to God for all the things that I have done wrong. In my heart, I know that I will trust Jesus with my life and death. Living a godly life as much as I can do with his grace, and trusting in his divine promises for the next leg of the journey that I will take someday across the River Jordan. Life and death is a battle and we all need to decide what and who do we believe in.

Meanwhile it seems like some good comes out of even medical issues. For instance, gratitude for kindness during this time, gratitude for God’s presence and comfort too. I look forward to future plans, God willing and hopefully enjoying the rest of the summer. I also think back to childhood lessons at home about preparing for sickness and surgery. First, go to God in prayer. Next, I remember the cleaning, and my house is clean. I remember getting laundry and food prepared in advance and that is done. I am grateful for some good and practical lessons that I learned and so now I am able to go on auto-pilot. My orchids are blooming throughout my house. My lavender, Shasta daisy will be visible from my bedroom window. 

Psalm 18: 1-6 (A scripture portion that I have contemplated as I awaited surgery.)

1. I love you, Lord, my strength. 

2. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

3. I call to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I have been saved from my enemies.

4. The cords of death entangled me; the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me;  the cords of the grave coiled around me; the snares of death confronted me.

6. In my distress I called to the Lord; I cried to my God for help. From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears. 

Everything is done. There is nothing left but for me to go to the hospital for that first time experience of a surgery. Tomorrow is the day. See you on the other side or next weeks blog post. ❤️✝️

* Some names have been changed, including the doctors’ name. Many of them can’t take constructive criticism. He might not be pleased LOL.

Broken Relationships-Part 2

It’s been a rough year for Leo*and friends of Leo too. That includes me. Leo is an old friend. Like every friendship, we have had our ups and downs over the years. Some of our issues emanate from the fact that I am a follower of Jesus Christ and Leo just thinks he is. He posits that since his Italian parents had him baptized as a child that he is “in like Flynn with God.” So, just like a genie, he somehow has God in a magic bottle and can summon him up whenever the need arises. This can be maddening at times when he lives an utterly debauched Manhattan lifestyle but, then turns to God when he needs to figure something out or when something goes wrong and he needs God to get him out of a jam.

This past year marks a time when he has turned to God as he tried to cope with the illness and ultimate death of another man’s wife. Even though he has never lived a Christian lifestyle, he believed that if he just attended church and lite candles for Lilia* that somehow he would open up a dialogue with God and get him to save her life. It seems like his concept was more a summoning of a spirit (Divine for me by a spirit-1 Samuel 28:8) rather than a relationship with the Lord. Oh come God, great spirit, you are present amid the incense and majestic organ music, I know it…. I had my work cut out for me.

What do I mean by debauched Manhattan lifestyle? Where do I begin? Leo changes women every three years whether he needs to or not. He reminds me of a celebrity with the same name who is also known for serial monogamy. I asked him why he can’t stay in relationship for more than three years and he seemingly has no idea. He acts like it has nothing to do with him at all. I guess, “where ignorance is bliss tis folly to be wise.” As a Christian I can’t go along with that.

Although he has been in a series of live-in relationships without the benefit of marriage he thinks that this is okay with God because he thinks that he conducted the relationships like a marriage. Just where in the Bible is that? Also, he puts a high value on having never cheated on any of the women that he was with as if that made everything okay. He believes his approach to relationships somehow sanitizes the situation and cleans it up. Only Jesus can clean it up Leo. Boy did he ever have huge justifications for his whole lifestyle but in the back of his mind I know that he knew it was not right with God. A man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh-Genesis 2:24. 

One of the women that he was with over the years was Lilia. Lilia was brought to the United States by one of those Christian groups that sponsors foreign nationals who are seeking citizenship in the United States. While she did accept the free gift of sponsorship from the church, she did not accept the free gift of salvation through Jesus Christ that the church discussed that was also available to her. Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved-Romans 10:9.

Lilia had received a Ph.D in nuclear physics in the Republic of Georgia. It was then that she decided to seek relocation to the United States of America in order to advance her career plan. Lilia faced some hurtles on the road to citizenship which she decided could be fixed if she met and married an American citizen, but who? That is when she met and seduced Leo. Leo liked the sex but, not enough to marry her. Why buy the cow when the milk’s free? Although he enjoyed having a woman who was intellectually his equal he described her from the early days as a difficult woman. I remember at the time thinking this was not a good sign. Generally, when you first date someone you have that new love excitement but, no not Leo. He immediately told me all about her perfectionism, her control issues and her egotism. This did not sound like an auspicious beginning but, Leo just let it ride. There was a turning point for them when they went on a vacation together. Leo sustained an injury and was even unconscious for a minute and all Lilia could say was, “you ruined my vacation.” Ding ding ding ding red flag deal changer, don’t you think? 

Something did change for Leo after that vacation. He was shocked by the way that she had treated him and he began to doubt her feelings for him. He began to think of breaking up. She tried to apologize and make things better but, things were not the same. Lilia was living with Leo at this point. She had insisted that he buy a huge antique bed that was way out of proportion in his small Manhattan apartment but Lilia just had to have it and now it was a constant reminder to Leo of what a schmuck he was. 

Lilia sensed all this but, was still trying to work him over. Finally, she told him that if he didn’t marry her that she would have to go back to Georgia. Even though he knew he didn’t want to marry her, he felt terribly guilty about possibly being responsible for that turn of events. Still, he had a deep sense that she wasn’t the right woman for him and they finally broke up. (Note-By following the Christian lifestyle and biblical wisdom and only sealing the deal in a Christian Marriage before you have sex could have saved Leo a whole lot of trouble.) He had a great deal of guilt about this even until the present time which I never understood. She has used this guilt to get him to do what she has wanted him to do over the years. 

However, despite Lilia’s dire prediction she was somehow able to remain in the United States. She eventually married a fellow Georgian,Vlad.* Vlad was a rather bohemian musician, almost a polar opposite to Lilia. They had one son together, Kiril.* Throughout the years, Lilia and Leo maintained a friendship. Leo loved to do that. He thought it the highest good to maintain good relations with as many of his ex’s as he could. He loved to have beautiful women on his arm to parade around the town. I always thought of these women as his harem and it was repugnant to me. But because of the temptation to sexual immortality each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband-1 Cor 7:2.

Can you ever really just be friends with an ex-lover? I think not. There is always that intimacy due to sexual encounter that you took without the benefit of marriage. There is an intimacy that remains always. One can still get an ego boost from that knowledge or you can even fall back into each other’s arms if conditions are right.

Leo was guilty of having a lot of emotional affairs all over the isle of Manhattan, uptown, downtown and midtown. He never seemed to get how these attachments “to all the girls that he loved before”-(Julio Iglesias & Willy Nelson) kept him from moving forward into a healthier relationship in the present. I was always uneasy about Leo’s relationship with Lilia. She always seemed to keep him captivated though and even though she was married, had a professorship and a child, she always seemed to have time for restaurant dates with Leo. He always paid of course. She went to him for advice and he to her. It did not seem right but, he did not ask for my approval and I did not give it.

About a year ago, I received an anguished call from Leo telling my of a very serious diagnosis that Lilia had received. The type and level of cancer he described told me that it did not look good. I immediately thought it was a terminal case but, Leo was like a crazed animal unable to accept this.

During the past year, Leo has been in terrible agony over this. He even placed his life on hold in order to take Lilia back and forth to Memorial Sloan Kettering appointments like a husband should. Only Leo wasn’t her husband, Vlad was. Leo researched Lilia’s condition and pushed the doctors into every intervention possible. He was crediting his own diagnostic skills rather than the doctors for keeping her alive. I am sure that the highly vaunted doctors of the prestigious hospital would be miffed at that notion! However, it seemed that Leo made sure that Lilia got all the state of the art treatment that the hospital had to offer. Poor Vlad was in the background being minimized by Leo. Vlad’s lack of fluency in the English language did not help him be able to come to the forefront of his wife’s treatment plan and Leo relished his role.

It was during this time that Leo wanted to be back on with God and he called me into the situation to make it happen. My husband and I are the only Christian people that he knows. Not knowing a single Christian  is not uncommon in New York City. That place is mission territory. The call I received told me that he was looking for a Christian take on the whole situation, sorta of a Christian consultation I suppose.

He began asking me questions about life and death, love and marriage and what the meaning of salvation was. We talked the Bible, the meaning of covenant marriage and God’s plan for eternal life. This past year I saw Leo really delve into the word of God. He agreed to listen to my Pastor’s Sunday sermons throughout the year. Although I no longer live in New York State my Pastor’s Sunday Sermons are available online. It was going very well too. He was getting some foundational Christian messages. We had long wonderful talks about my Pastor’s sermons and I was praying for both he and Lilia to be able to come to know Jesus as their Lord and Savior. 

In moments of lucidity Lilia talked of going to Venice. Knowing that was not going to be possible, I suggested to Leo that he get in the car and take Lilia on a little vacation to my country home. My offer was to host them and cook healthy food, spend time in the Bible amid a lovely country setting.To my surprise, neither Leo nor Lilia were adverse to the message of the gospel. Instead, I found two people with advanced degrees in science who were functionally illiterate in Christian foundationals. 

My husband and I prayed for them every day. More than anything I prayed for them to come to know who God is and what he has done. I understood that knowing God would straighten out their crazy lives. That’s who God is, he is a waymaker. He makes everything clear such as right versus wrong. He has a definition of love which puts the second rate worldly sense of love to shame. He brings clarity and comfort amid the turmoil that we face. All the things that I hoped and wished for Leo, Lilia and even Vlad and Kiril to have.

As I expected, Lilia’s health went from bad to worse. At times such as this, people crack or maybe they just show you who they really are in a dramatic fashion. That is what happened with both Leo and Lilia. People often act out their philosophy of life at the last minutes of life. Lilia realized her days were numbered and she even wanted to hasten her demise by getting off of her breathing tube. She told Leo that she didn’t give a darn and f**k Vlad. 

Near the end of her life, Lilia’s husband Vlad dropped one on Leo too. He told Leo that Lilia had been having an affair with a married colleague at the university for fifteen years. Leo was shocked that he never knew this and resented having Vlad, Robert* and himself sitting at her hospital bedside at the end. Can you imagine the nerve of this bum after the way that he treated Vlad resenting Robert’s presence? It sort of served him right. It was then that I realized that he was part of Lilia’s harem. He wanted to be the one that she truly loved and he resented sharing the spotlight with any of these other dudes. 

Lilia really went out with a bang. A few weeks before her death, she told Leo that she was leaving him  her upper East Side condominium. Her husband would get her other financial assets and a second condominium that she owned which was located in New Jersey. She always craved attention and she got it. This was a shocking arrangement. When Leo told me about it, I was stunned. Leo tried to soften the news by letting me know that he never expected anything from Lilia’s estate. He also wanted me to know that acquiring this U.E.S. pad could help get him out of a difficult situation. Furthermore, he even tried to convince me that Vlad didn’t care if Leo got Vlad’s apartment. I found that very, very hard to believe. Vlad didn’t mind if he was going to have to move out of his apartment? Vlad didn’t have any feelings about his primary residence, a piece of prime Manhattan real estate, that he had been living in with his wife was about to be gifted by his wife to a former lover?

Leo should have gotten a clue that Vlad really did have feelings about everything going on but, those thoughts were not convenient for him. Leo asked me why I thought that Vlad would tell him about Lilia’s affair?

While Leo took Lilia to every doctor’s appointment and was professing her love to him, she was living with her husband and even had a boyfriend. At the end, she told Leo how good they would have been together. She further tortured him by saying that he should have married her when she asked him. Whey wasn’t I buying any of this? I want to know what she told Vlad and Robert during their private moments. Another old friend of Leo’s even suggested that there may have been other men too. Lilia had dated his best friend and broken his heart by cheating.This man was quite credible and said that he had kept this and some other facts from Leo so as to not hurt him. Lilia may have been cheating on everyone she was ever with! What made Leo think that she loved him? It was all so tragic and sinful.

It all came back to the many conversations that we had about the deep biblical definition of love. The type of love that uplifts, that is faithful and that serves. It entails a forever covenant not just a convenient union forged for immigration purposes. Leo has so many great qualities but when push comes to shove, he is unable to understand a deeper meaning for love. At the very least he has a deeply flawed definition of what love means. His definition of love is the kind of  love that movies and television promote. The type of love that people settle for. Leo has been settling his entire life. Could he want more or would he settle for this cheap imitation of love? Also, would the possibility of a huge financial asset such as an Upper East Side Apartment make him forget everything he has begun to learn in the Bible concerning love of money as the root of all evil? This is a huge temptation for Leo. He had been screwed in his own families’ wills a few times and it had left him with a lot of anger. Leo had a very complicated situation arise with his father’s Italian will when he passed away. The case was so complicated that it has lasted for years and Leo has yet to get one dime from his father’s estate. Why? The chilling answer is there was some goomahs who approached the court seeking money from the estate. For those not familiar with the New York Italian slang, a goomah refers to a mistress. 

The parallels with Lilia’s many men and complications in her will has a strong similarity to what Leo’s father’s estate looked like. I pointed this out to him but he just couldn’t see it. Leo has a bunch of huge temptations in his way blocking his path to God. Will he move forward? All I know is that as soon as money came into the picture, suddenly Leo went from studying the Bible to seeking my approval for his actions. When he pushed me, I cautioned him to take some time to think about the right and wrong of the situation from God’s point of view before moving forward. I have not heard from him since then. 

Lessons from the Bible: But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints.-Ephesians 5:3.

* The names were changed for privacy. A few events may be out of chronological order because Leo just doesn’t make sense some times!

Broken Relationships-Part 1

As of late, I have been thinking about the confluence of relationships and Christianity. What is the role of a Christian as a friend, spouse, or neighbor when we have to deal with less than ideal friendships, difficult family members or situations? Do we work with what we have and try to serve in the situation? When do we plant godly seeds of wisdom and tell them about Jesus? What is our signal to back off? Do we leave an abusive situation, decide that someone is a lost cause, and do we continue to pray for them? Does the Bible help us understand how to navigate these perilous situations? It has been my experience that these topics are sure to spark intense debate in Christian circles. In fact, my own intense debates on this topic with friends and family have inspired this post series. 

It would appear that Cammie* is the perfect Pastor’s wife  unless you look a little bit closer. Then, you will find an onion with layers upon layers, in this case, of trauma. I have no idea what lies beneath but I can guess. Cammie is not unlike Brooklyn,* a deceased relative of my husband’s who shared some disturbing stories a while ago. Both women decided to share deeply traumatic childhood memories with me at a point when they hardly knew me. 

As a Christian, I always strive to treat a situation such as childhood abuse with godliness and love. In Cammie’s case, when we were speaking of a completely unrelated topic she suddenly changed the course of the very tepid conversation to boiling when she told me she was a childhood victim of sexual abuse at the hands of her father and the cult that he belonged to. This revelation literally took the air right out of my lungs and suddenly everything seemed to move forward in slow-motion.

Looking her in the eye, I told her that I was very sorry that this had happened to her. She went into some details including that it was all a repressed memory until she gave birth to her first child Chloe.* Apparently, she suffered some sort of breakdown at that point. When confronting her mother about these memories she indicated to me that her mother did not believe her. At this point, her mother was already divorced from her father and she had remarried another man. She informed her mother that the abuse occurred in some sort of loft in her mother’s home. Cammie would not speak to her mother for five years because she did not like her mother’s response to her allegations of abuse. She eventually reconciled with her mother but still sleeps in the loft space that she was abused in whenever she visits her mother.

I was flabbergasted by this story. I asked her where she was in the healing and forgiveness journey after all that had happened? To my surprise, Cammie could not say a word. I told her that I don’t think that I would want to sleep in that loft if that had happened to me and wondered if there was at least a sofa or pullout bed on the premises that she could sleep on instead? Or, better yet a local motel to stay at? Again, no response. “What gives?”,  I thought. 

Then there was Brooklyn. When I was first married, she was one of my husbands older family members that I really connected with. She seemed friendly and helpful. However, I quickly noted that she had a dislike of her own very elderly mother. I was doing a number of visits to get to know my husbands family and meet some of them for the first time. It was the day before I was supposed to meet Brooklyn’s mother in an assisted living facility when Brooklyn came to me with some disturbing news.

Apparently after Brooklyn’s dad abandoned the family, her mother hooked up with a number of men. She even ended some unwanted pregnancies herself. According to Brooklyn who was a child at the time, her mother insisted that she assist in the disposal process. The imagery and story revolted me. I again shared my sorrow that such a thing had happened to her. How could a mother do such a thing to a young girl?

Just as before, I asked her where she was in the healing process and how her relationship with her mother was today? Had she told her mother how she felt? The answer was “no, I have not discussed this with her.” Since she was already an old woman I realized that Brooklyn had lived her entire life with this truth hanging over her head and had not worked through any of these issues. She succeeded in poisoning my relationship with her mother from ever going forward too. I could barely say a word to her when I met her the next day. I was in shock. It seemed she was purposefully putting the kabosh on my relationship with her mother Lily.*  Or, was she?

 In the privacy of my online diary where the names are changed for privacy, I think that I can safely ask some questions. First question is: did these things actually happen? Are these people telling me the truth? Some things are so outrageous that they are very hard to believe. That does not mean they are not true. However, haven’t there been some well publicized cases of outrageous stories that turned out to be a lie? 

Also, I understand the human mind has coping mechanisms to protect us from unpleasant things but still, are repressed memories even real? I know that I am not the first person to ask that question. Is it possibly a delusion? I wondered this about both cases. It appeared that both women had struggles with mental health but, which came first the chicken or the egg?

On the other hand, we watched absolute evil play out in the P. Diddy trial in New York City. The depravity depicted by witnesses seems to know no bounds. Did Cammie and Brooklyn fall prey to terrible abuse at the hands of their parents? Sin is an equal opportunity evil which plays out everywhere. Did the abuse leave these women so torn up inside that even their relationship with Christ was fractured? These were some of my first thoughts.

Next, I wondered how a follower of Jesus ought to approach their interactions with an abuse victim? Had I said the right thing to begin with? Hearing stories such as I have heard from Cammie and Brooklyn is not unlike going to a funeral in that you know something deeply traumatic has unfolded and we all wish to say the right thing. 

As a Christian, I have no doubt that protecting and nurturing children is our mission and abuse in any form is a sin. Jesus makes that very clear when he says in Luke 17:2, “it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and be cast into the sea, then that he should offend one of these little ones.” That is a very strong statement indeed. However, our society has started to challenge this and many similar ideas. There are those who would think it okay to have sex with a child, that movement seeks to place the idea in our heads that children are sexual creatures and should be allowed to pursue it.That shocking idea has gained traction unfortunately. There is no better example of harmful behavior towards children than this whole mutilation cult which is part of the transgender movement. All of this is opposite to the Christian faith and we must proclaim that!

Jesus interrupted cultural norms of dismissing children and showed us how precious children are to him, he said to let the little children come to him and not to hinder them for such is the kingdom of heaven. This particular verse shows that the innocence and purity of children is heavenly and further put a fine point on protecting them. 

Another element of Christian life that subtly informs this topic concerns the concept of responsibility that we all are given and must justly exercise. This is a thread throughout the Bible. No authority is given except by God and we must be good stewards of children under our care whether we be family, neighbor, babysitters, workers at schools or daycare. We will be judged by God for how we exercise our responsibility in this department. 

And, I can see why as I got to know Cammie and Brooklyn better. They are broken in a thousand pieces because of something that happened to them. I see this in many areas. I believe that spilling out inappropriate life stories to someone you just meet is a symptom of broken boundaries with people that may have begun with adults taking inappropriate actions with them. I am happy to assist them if I can but some other people hearing this indiscriminately might not be so helpful.

Interactions with these ladies lead me to feel that whatever did or didn’t happen, these ladies’ lives revolved around this story. Although I have learned both these ladies have had therapy, it never seemed to help and this wound is always opened and has never healed over. That is not God’s design. God has created us to physically and spiritually heal unless things are radically wrong. A relationship with Christ, which both women claim, grows and changes us to overcome, forgive and move on in positive ways from abuse. 

It is so easy to get into circular thinking, caught up in a sort of centripetal motion of behavior surrounding something traumatic. This state has come to be called Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD for short. The start of healing is honest prayer to God, Sharing in a healthy way can happen but it must be done with righteous and safe confidantes, not just anyone (Guard your heart folks from unnessary pain). Forgiveness needs to begin. Forgiveness does not mean you call what the person does right. After all, God forgives our sins but never calls our sins right.Forgiveness does not mean we don’t put up proper boundaries with people or ever put ourselves in harms way. 

My relationships with both these ladies have not been easy. They have both had many struggles with their relationships throughout the years. Will I ever know what really happened? I doubt it but, I continue to pray, quote the Bible and serve as best that I can. 

* the names are changed to protect privacy. 

Next Week: Broken Relationships-Part 2

Super Donald Part 2-Staying the Course

Events are moving so fast that I felt a Super Donald Part 2 was in order. I qualify it with Staying the Course. As believers we should understand the meaning of staying the course but, sometimes we have just intellectualized the meaning and are not equipped to handle the reality of what it actually means. Maybe our lives have been blessed with ease and comfort and we are not war-ready. Sometimes we are busy staying financially afloat or our family life leaves us little time for civic contributions.

It’s not as if the Bible doesn't give us ample advice on the topic. The United States is changing for the better and in very short order President Trump has begun doing what the majority of voters asked him to do, i.e. to right the degenerate course that the nation had taken. 

Now Super Donald is cleaning up a huge mess that the democrats have made of our social order, religious freedoms, criminal justice system, economic engine, national and world systems. We are going to need to muster up all the courage that we have to stand behind President Trump because the group that weaponized the DA’s Office, the FBI, the CIA and used media and universities to push their agenda will fight a dirty fight against the duly elected President, his supporters and godly principles.That is pretty much where we are after Super Donald has begun his second term.

My head has been spinning all week, there is so much going on. Let’s start with the Israeli hostages being released. How could the world have stood by and allowed Iran and its’ proxies to do such unspeakable things? President Trump is like the child in the Hans Christian Anderson story entitled, “The Emperor’s New Clothes.” Just as in the story, Trump dares to tell the truth while those around him continue to ignore it. He has sent the Middle East into paroxysms with this truth. He suggested that the Palestinians should be resettled to other countries on a voluntary basis. 

When I first heard this, I thought it was the most original solution that had been floated in quite some time. Nothing has worked in the past to settle disputes between Israel and the so-called Palestinians. We should remember that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome. I say so-called Palestinians because as far as I can tell, most of the people calling themselves Palestinians have their ancestry in Egypt, Syria or the Arabian peninsula. Israel is the Jewish homeland and that homeland from ancient times has been called Israel. The term “Palestine” was the derisive name assigned Israel by the Roman Empire to break their spirit. These are the same Romans who have the Arch of Titus in Rome commemorating the looting of Jerusalem. (Note: whatever happened to that menorah that is pictured on the Arch?)

It is time to acknowledge the fact that every deal offered to try and bring about a two-state solution was rejected by the so-called Palestinians and sadly they have never missed a chance to attack a Jewish children’s school, synagogue or bus stop where innocent civilians are located. They have used the huge foreign aid given to them to build tunnels, buy weapons because all they want to do is destroy the Jewish state and finish the work that Hitler began and annihilate the Jews. They had more than enough capital to have financed good health care, stellar educational institutions, or to establish better trade and business practices. Instead, they used all their financial and human resources to mount a sick and twisted attack on concert goers, families, the elderly and children crouching in safe rooms. They burned, mutilated, and gang-raped women, and men. They kidnapped civilians and tortured them for over a year. The medical care given was on par with Doctor Mengele’s protocols in Germany. The so-called Palestinians voted for this, supported it and cheered each Jewish kill like it was a point in a football match. Great job so-called Palestinians your civilization will be judged by all this.

If we think we are such a great world, you know the type of world that should join together with no borders and form one health system and have one government, then how could our brothers in Hamas, Hezbollah and the Houthis not be singing Kumbaya with us? Are we ready to join in climate agendas  and health decisions with totalitarian leaders? No, I don’t think so either. Maybe, we should re-think that. That is exactly what a lot of people were thinking who joined together in a massive effort to fight the insanity in the United States and we won.

Now is the hard work. The trade wars, the re-negotiations, the ridicule, and the protests by anti-democratic forces and crazy trans sex cult members. Can we handle it? Can we handle the fire China will rain down? Can we handle the terrorist attacks? Not without God we can’t. We will quickly lose heart without God. 

P.S. Could Trump be working on an Easter agreement between Russia and Ukraine? Please keep praying for a deal to be made as we celebrate the season of Resurrection. What a wonderful Easter gift that would be.