It has been almost five years since a six year old child died of a drug overdose in the Village of XXXXXX* in Westchester County, N.Y. The District Attorney, at the time, announced the indictment of the girls' mother in the fall of that year. It was a crazy case and a travesty of justice for poor little XXXXX XXXX*.
The travesty is her mother was enabled and is still enabled to get away with murder. It is not that the legal system hadn't tried its' utmost to establish a case against her. No, the travesty concerns how those around this poor child failed to act on her behalf to make sure that this mother did not have custody of this child.
When the case emerged, there was a complete lack of real journalistic coverage but lots of pandering. The local coverage included a piece about a eulogy given by the child's first grade teacher. The piece talked about how much her mother loved this dear child. This, after a highly suspicious story had already emerged concerning the child's death. The quoted eulogy spent an inordinate amount of time in praise of the child's mother. The better eulogy would have been to keep the focus solely on the deceased first grader, and to comfort those who were obviously the injured parties. Other coverage featured her lawyer talking about how we should be outraged over Ms. XXXXX's indictment, noting that this could happen to any of us. After all, we all have medicine that our kids could accidentally get their hands on. REALLY, any of us? The police indicated that the bedroom where the child died was strewn with alcohol, heroin,valium, and methadone.
For those of you not familiar with the story of how this small child's short life was ended by the negligence of her criminal, drug addicted mother, here it is. On Easter of 2015, the baby daddy of this little girl came by to pick-up his daughter for visitation. The child and her mother lived with the grandfather in his home in the Village of XXXXXX, NY. I don't know what grandpa was doing on that Easter but it wasn't spending that holiday morning enjoying time with his daughter and granddaughter. He must have been so co-dependent with his daughter. that the events to come were inevitable. XXXXX and her mother were found unconscious in a bedroom when the child's father found them about 1 PM.
The mother had been a nurse whose license was revoked after two incidents. One was for stealing some Demerol from a nursing home where she was employed. The other incident involved driving impaired. It takes a lot of bravery to face the truth when a family member is a criminal, or when our ex is a drug addict. It takes moral courage to face the neccesary steps to ensure that our child or grandchild is safe from any harm that a person like this might do. We must face the truth that is around us and act wisely. It will not be easy
The medical report showed how this little girl died after ingesting a fatal combination of Benadryl, morphine and diazepam (antidepressant). Yet, the mother got no jail time. What a modern tragedy! What a shame on our community that the generation that thought they knew better than their parents produced a bunch of junkie children who do not know the difference between right and wrong.
*- No one has publicly discussed this case in any meaningful way. Privately, however, I have heard people fiercely debate the rights and wrongs of what happened. The Bible says, it is better that a millstone be placed around your neck than you hurt a little one. Drug addiction is a terrible blight upon a family and it cost the life of a sweet little girl. That should never have happenened, but there are many similar stories happening everyday. We need to act quickly in the defense of any helpless child that we know of in this situation. Do I care about the drug addict? Yes, of course. I hope that we can encourage people to get help for their problems. In the emergency room of life, we have to decide which patient to treat first. We must choose to help an innocent child first!
P.S. The mother spoken of in this case met her sad ending in a cheap motel in Westchester County, NY due to a drug overdose. Don't do drugs folks, please. Dear Lord, lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen.
Sunday, September 29, 2019
Sunday, September 22, 2019
Are You Sorry?
It seems to me the hardest thing in the world anyone has to do is to say that they are sorry for something. To apologize seems tantamount in many people's minds to being a loser. Don't admit to your husband you made a mistake or he will have the upper hand. Throw someone under the bus at work or you could get in trouble. By the time one becomes a teenager, they have learned not only not to apologize but, the art of placing blame on parents, teachers, or society. Speaking of society, it has created huge legal ramifications to admitting fault. Doctors in the Untied States for example, are terrified of getting caught in a mistake. What about admitting you did a crime in court and apologizing? Well, some people would rather lie and see if they can get away with a crime by using a crazy defense. Apologies only hesitatingly come when it could help reduce the time one would spend in jail. So, why would you do it, apologize that is?
Apologizing will have ramifications in our life. According to the New Oxford American Dictionary an apology is defined as a regretful acknowledgement of an offense or failure. We can see that the essence of apologizing is to admit a wrong and then to take responsibility for that wrong-doing. There will be consequences which can run the gamut from loosing a relationship, a job, or going to jail. But, most of the time we will not have so severe an outcome. Perhaps, we will be put on probabation. Maybe, our friend will forgive us and continue on as before.
However, apologies do embarrass us because they bring us the realization of our fallen humanity. We don't like that. We think ourselves better than we are and struggle to accept that we are sinners. But, what else could explain everything that you have seen in your own life or in the history of the world? The word sin comes from the lexicon of archery. It connotes missing the mark that you are aiming for. The fact is we sin against others and others sin against us.
Actually, we do it multiple times every day. We might miss the mark by flirting with someone even though we are dating someone else. In anger, we may have lashed out wrongfully at a child today. There are so many things that we can do wrong. The list of things is endless. Christianity reflects this reality when it showcases an array of characters in the Bible and lists their wrongdoings. We see that some of them are sorry for what they have done and others are not. We have that choice of course. We can go through life flipping people off and deflecting responsibility taking. We can blame things on others, Adam did (Genesis 3:12-The man (Adam) said, "the woman you put here with me-she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.") and King Saul did it too. (1 Samuel 15:24- "Then Saul said to Samuel, "I have sinned; I have indeed transgressed the command of the Lord and your words because I feared the people and listened to their voice."
Or, we can follow God's lead and acknowledge our wrongdoings and ask Him and others for forgiveness. Jesus says in Luke 5:32- I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance." I can definitely say at this point in my life, that I wished I could go back and say I'm sorry to some people for some things that I did. Don't you feel that way too? Some things seemed really important at the time but don't matter at all to me now. Some people that I loved passed away without reconciliation occurring. It's a real tragedy when that happens.
The Bible even goes so far as to encourage us to communicate our feelings to someone when they have hurt us. It encourages us to be patient in the forgiveness process as well. So watch yourselves."If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying I repent,' you must forgive them."-Luke 17:3-4
A relationship in good standing with God and one another is contingent upon repentance and forgiveness. What relationship is not touched by the need for repentance and the seeking of forgiveness? Many people who don't feel the need to apologize often end up alone with only their pride to comfort them. What cold comfort that is. Revelation 2:5-Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.
Apologizing will have ramifications in our life. According to the New Oxford American Dictionary an apology is defined as a regretful acknowledgement of an offense or failure. We can see that the essence of apologizing is to admit a wrong and then to take responsibility for that wrong-doing. There will be consequences which can run the gamut from loosing a relationship, a job, or going to jail. But, most of the time we will not have so severe an outcome. Perhaps, we will be put on probabation. Maybe, our friend will forgive us and continue on as before.
However, apologies do embarrass us because they bring us the realization of our fallen humanity. We don't like that. We think ourselves better than we are and struggle to accept that we are sinners. But, what else could explain everything that you have seen in your own life or in the history of the world? The word sin comes from the lexicon of archery. It connotes missing the mark that you are aiming for. The fact is we sin against others and others sin against us.
Actually, we do it multiple times every day. We might miss the mark by flirting with someone even though we are dating someone else. In anger, we may have lashed out wrongfully at a child today. There are so many things that we can do wrong. The list of things is endless. Christianity reflects this reality when it showcases an array of characters in the Bible and lists their wrongdoings. We see that some of them are sorry for what they have done and others are not. We have that choice of course. We can go through life flipping people off and deflecting responsibility taking. We can blame things on others, Adam did (Genesis 3:12-The man (Adam) said, "the woman you put here with me-she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.") and King Saul did it too. (1 Samuel 15:24- "Then Saul said to Samuel, "I have sinned; I have indeed transgressed the command of the Lord and your words because I feared the people and listened to their voice."
Or, we can follow God's lead and acknowledge our wrongdoings and ask Him and others for forgiveness. Jesus says in Luke 5:32- I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance." I can definitely say at this point in my life, that I wished I could go back and say I'm sorry to some people for some things that I did. Don't you feel that way too? Some things seemed really important at the time but don't matter at all to me now. Some people that I loved passed away without reconciliation occurring. It's a real tragedy when that happens.
The Bible even goes so far as to encourage us to communicate our feelings to someone when they have hurt us. It encourages us to be patient in the forgiveness process as well. So watch yourselves."If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying I repent,' you must forgive them."-Luke 17:3-4
A relationship in good standing with God and one another is contingent upon repentance and forgiveness. What relationship is not touched by the need for repentance and the seeking of forgiveness? Many people who don't feel the need to apologize often end up alone with only their pride to comfort them. What cold comfort that is. Revelation 2:5-Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.
Friday, September 13, 2019
Burning What?
Elena* just hasn't been the same since her separation from Adelmo.* Something seemed to go out of her when he left her. Or maybe I should say something's gotten into her! Elena was never the domestic type but, when she met Adelmo she seemed to try. Settling into a marriage and parenthood seemed to calm her down a lot from her wild child past.
Elena, who is half German and half Hungarian, struggled with her Germaness from the beginning. She felt much more at home when visiting her family in Hungary. She related more to the Slavic experience and cultural happenings. She had a great job however, which kept her in Germany most of the time.
She seemed to just be going though the motions of life when she met Adelmo. Chosen to attend a business conference from her department, she expected this to be another boring business meeting. But something was different as she exited the elevator after arriving at her destination. The delicious aroma of food wafted through the air and served as invisible bread crumbs leading her to that meeting.
This lunch meeting was catered by a cook from Brazil named Adelmo. Her first introduction to Brazilian cuisine left her wanting more and I don't just mean the food. Adelmo was gracious and kind as he explained the Brazilian meal to the conference attendees. The attraction between them was mutual and immediate. It lead to marriage and a family and Elena was never happier.
In some ways Adelmo was the polar opposite of Elena. He loved home and hearth and he taught her to see the joys of domestic life. He also had a very different past than Elena. As I described before, Elena had kind of a wild past. She use to stay out all night dancing, there was the men and some of them married. Adelmo's past was pretty tame in comparison. He was a bit of a momma's boy, who enjoyed time with friends and family and didn't stay out partying.
He was also quite a bit younger than Elena. Some say that she was a mother substitute for him, others say that she was on the immature side and was mentally more his age. The marriage lasted ten years. Adelmo surprised her when he suddenly moved out of their apartment, but it had been coming on for a long time. When this separation and divorce got underway, Elena lost the stabilizing influence of Adelmo and began to go back to some of her old ways.
It was hard for me to see this because I felt that her life had been going in the right direction. I was worried that she just might go back to some of her previous destructive habits. There was a lot at stake now. She had a son who needed her to be a good role model, and she was not as young as she used to be.
My worst fears were realized and before long she had joined a salsa club and was dating a man even younger than Adelmo. She was focused on her beauty, meeting men and having a good time. There was a definite return to immature patterns that had existed in her past. But, nothing prepared me for what came next!
I used to look forward to seeing Elena once or twice a year when I visited Germany. Now, my focus centered on how I could be a blessing to her. As a Christian, we are called to plant seeds of wisdom and offer godly counsel at times such as this. We met in Berlin at Café im Literaturhaus. I love that place!
I inquired how her son was dealing with the impending divorce. What I learned was disheartening. Her son's performance at school was suffering. The teachers had met with her a few times to discuss a strategy to fix things. Her reaction to this seemed to indicate that she was dealing with this problem by buying more things for her son and planning a vacation for the two of them as well.
As I started to fire off a litany of books that I would recommend which might shed some light on the situation, I started to see that I was getting no support from Elena. She seemed to continue on with ways to comfort her son which seemed to focus in on gift-giving. "Oh Elena," I said "we all want to spoil our kids and make them feel special when life throws them curveballs but often that doesn't help and furthermore it might actually hurt them."
"But, I want to focus on good times ahead and new experiences." With this she pulled out her phone to show me the latest photos of their alpine ski vacation. The smiling selfies were endless. The appearance of happiness, rather than actual happiness. Not to put too fine of a point to it, but he even broke his arm on the trip. Her attempts to mitigate her family crisis seemed doomed to failure.
Would she learn the lesson, I hoped so, but then she dropped the bombshell. "I am already planning a trip to The United States for Max's* high school graduation. We will rent a trailer and drive the pacific coast highway before visiting the desert southwest. Have you and your husband every heard of burning man?"
"Yes, of course we have. I just read an article about it in the New York Post." She continued, "would you ever consider going?" "Elena," I explained, "you know that my husband and I are Christians right? The whole burning man event is in direct opposition to all that we believe. I don't think it is someplace to take your high school senior to either."
Elena seemed unprepared for what I had just said, and focused instead on the artistic and cultural importance of this event. I could not believe what I was hearing! "Elena" I said, "you have been sadly mislead. This desert event is a cultic, pagan gathering. It is dangerous not just physically but more than anything spiritually."
"Let's start with the name Elena. The name Burning Man immediately brings to mind the ancient Druid Wicker Man. The artists who gathered thirty years ago who created the ten day Burning Man event may have thought they were creating something new but, upon careful perusal it is clear that Burning Man is nothing more than a re-hashing of many ancient pagan practices."
"The Ancient practices of the Druids included having a ritual straw and wooden figure built yearly. After the figure was erected, the annual festival ensued; which included sex with Druid priestesses, dancing, drinking and ultimately culminated in the burning of that figurine. Much of what we know of this ancient practice is clouded by the sands of time. Was there human sacrifice? Some ancient sources suggest that."
"We can also favorably compare Burning Man to the rites that occurred during the polytheistic Greek and Roman festitvals of the past. The image of Gaia, the Ancient Greek earth goddess has figured prominently in Burning Man events, one way or the other. The concept of inebriation always figures into paganism too. So, the drinking and drugs of burning man is right in line with what occurred at the Bacchanalian feasts of Rome or at the temples of Zeus, Athena, or Aphrodite. Speaking of Aphrodite the goddess of love, how can we say the orgies occurring every year at Burning Man are any different from the sexual practices occurring at the Temple of Aphrodite? We can't."
Many celebrities, so-called intellectuals and tech gurus consider attendance at this loathsome event de rigeur. The elitist status given to Burning Man points to our civilization burning, not to artistic achievement. It helps explain why our loved ones such as Elena would consider taking their impressionable young men to an orgy dome. Yes, you heard that right orgy dome. It is nothing that hasn't been done before. People following like sheep the dictates of intellectual and trending falsities rather than cleaving to that which is wholesome and holy. I only hope that I was able to point Elena in the right direction. The one true direction that there is, Jesus Christ!
* the names and a few minor facts were changed but the story is real.
Elena, who is half German and half Hungarian, struggled with her Germaness from the beginning. She felt much more at home when visiting her family in Hungary. She related more to the Slavic experience and cultural happenings. She had a great job however, which kept her in Germany most of the time.
She seemed to just be going though the motions of life when she met Adelmo. Chosen to attend a business conference from her department, she expected this to be another boring business meeting. But something was different as she exited the elevator after arriving at her destination. The delicious aroma of food wafted through the air and served as invisible bread crumbs leading her to that meeting.
This lunch meeting was catered by a cook from Brazil named Adelmo. Her first introduction to Brazilian cuisine left her wanting more and I don't just mean the food. Adelmo was gracious and kind as he explained the Brazilian meal to the conference attendees. The attraction between them was mutual and immediate. It lead to marriage and a family and Elena was never happier.
In some ways Adelmo was the polar opposite of Elena. He loved home and hearth and he taught her to see the joys of domestic life. He also had a very different past than Elena. As I described before, Elena had kind of a wild past. She use to stay out all night dancing, there was the men and some of them married. Adelmo's past was pretty tame in comparison. He was a bit of a momma's boy, who enjoyed time with friends and family and didn't stay out partying.
He was also quite a bit younger than Elena. Some say that she was a mother substitute for him, others say that she was on the immature side and was mentally more his age. The marriage lasted ten years. Adelmo surprised her when he suddenly moved out of their apartment, but it had been coming on for a long time. When this separation and divorce got underway, Elena lost the stabilizing influence of Adelmo and began to go back to some of her old ways.
It was hard for me to see this because I felt that her life had been going in the right direction. I was worried that she just might go back to some of her previous destructive habits. There was a lot at stake now. She had a son who needed her to be a good role model, and she was not as young as she used to be.
My worst fears were realized and before long she had joined a salsa club and was dating a man even younger than Adelmo. She was focused on her beauty, meeting men and having a good time. There was a definite return to immature patterns that had existed in her past. But, nothing prepared me for what came next!
I used to look forward to seeing Elena once or twice a year when I visited Germany. Now, my focus centered on how I could be a blessing to her. As a Christian, we are called to plant seeds of wisdom and offer godly counsel at times such as this. We met in Berlin at Café im Literaturhaus. I love that place!
I inquired how her son was dealing with the impending divorce. What I learned was disheartening. Her son's performance at school was suffering. The teachers had met with her a few times to discuss a strategy to fix things. Her reaction to this seemed to indicate that she was dealing with this problem by buying more things for her son and planning a vacation for the two of them as well.
As I started to fire off a litany of books that I would recommend which might shed some light on the situation, I started to see that I was getting no support from Elena. She seemed to continue on with ways to comfort her son which seemed to focus in on gift-giving. "Oh Elena," I said "we all want to spoil our kids and make them feel special when life throws them curveballs but often that doesn't help and furthermore it might actually hurt them."
"But, I want to focus on good times ahead and new experiences." With this she pulled out her phone to show me the latest photos of their alpine ski vacation. The smiling selfies were endless. The appearance of happiness, rather than actual happiness. Not to put too fine of a point to it, but he even broke his arm on the trip. Her attempts to mitigate her family crisis seemed doomed to failure.
Would she learn the lesson, I hoped so, but then she dropped the bombshell. "I am already planning a trip to The United States for Max's* high school graduation. We will rent a trailer and drive the pacific coast highway before visiting the desert southwest. Have you and your husband every heard of burning man?"
"Yes, of course we have. I just read an article about it in the New York Post." She continued, "would you ever consider going?" "Elena," I explained, "you know that my husband and I are Christians right? The whole burning man event is in direct opposition to all that we believe. I don't think it is someplace to take your high school senior to either."
Elena seemed unprepared for what I had just said, and focused instead on the artistic and cultural importance of this event. I could not believe what I was hearing! "Elena" I said, "you have been sadly mislead. This desert event is a cultic, pagan gathering. It is dangerous not just physically but more than anything spiritually."
"Let's start with the name Elena. The name Burning Man immediately brings to mind the ancient Druid Wicker Man. The artists who gathered thirty years ago who created the ten day Burning Man event may have thought they were creating something new but, upon careful perusal it is clear that Burning Man is nothing more than a re-hashing of many ancient pagan practices."
"The Ancient practices of the Druids included having a ritual straw and wooden figure built yearly. After the figure was erected, the annual festival ensued; which included sex with Druid priestesses, dancing, drinking and ultimately culminated in the burning of that figurine. Much of what we know of this ancient practice is clouded by the sands of time. Was there human sacrifice? Some ancient sources suggest that."
"We can also favorably compare Burning Man to the rites that occurred during the polytheistic Greek and Roman festitvals of the past. The image of Gaia, the Ancient Greek earth goddess has figured prominently in Burning Man events, one way or the other. The concept of inebriation always figures into paganism too. So, the drinking and drugs of burning man is right in line with what occurred at the Bacchanalian feasts of Rome or at the temples of Zeus, Athena, or Aphrodite. Speaking of Aphrodite the goddess of love, how can we say the orgies occurring every year at Burning Man are any different from the sexual practices occurring at the Temple of Aphrodite? We can't."
Many celebrities, so-called intellectuals and tech gurus consider attendance at this loathsome event de rigeur. The elitist status given to Burning Man points to our civilization burning, not to artistic achievement. It helps explain why our loved ones such as Elena would consider taking their impressionable young men to an orgy dome. Yes, you heard that right orgy dome. It is nothing that hasn't been done before. People following like sheep the dictates of intellectual and trending falsities rather than cleaving to that which is wholesome and holy. I only hope that I was able to point Elena in the right direction. The one true direction that there is, Jesus Christ!
* the names and a few minor facts were changed but the story is real.
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