The popular kids all have a certain look. It all seems so rigid and unfair. Your hair has to do this, you have to be this weight, or that height. What about clothes and accessories? I remember Selena* telling me this story. "The thing this semester is that you have to have a Kate Spade bag. If you don't have one than you're a loser. I hate Kate Spade and I am not going to do it to please everyone else!" Way to go Selena!
Then there was Amber*. Amber was bullied. What was done to her in a Westchester, N.Y. school was disgusting. Why did this happen? She was cruelly teased because of her clothes, glasses, and being overweight. Amber was a wonderful, sensitive person who did not come from a wealthy family. At times, both her mother and father had to work two jobs to make ends meet. She did not have the latest phone or the latest fashion. In fact, she and her family frequently wore clothes that friends and family gave them after they could no longer use them.
Jake* got along well in elementary school, but once he got to middle school that changed. You see, when you have a genetic disorder that makes you short of stature, kids don't even notice it until they start getting taller themselves. His brother was quite the opposite. First string on the high school varsity football team assured him respect as he walked down the hallways, as well as a cheerleader girlfriend.
It can be so frustrating when people judge us on how we look or what we wear. Jake* told me that simply have an acne breakout could assure that he got ridiculed all day. I relate to Jake. I remember if I saw even a single pimple, telling my mother that I wanted to stay home from school that day! What about the fear of wearing the wrong sneakers? In my school, if your shoes were the wrong color, it was practically a scandal. What about your school? Are there things you know that you just don't do at your school, such as listening to certain music, kissing your mom, or wearing certain pants?
These rules are so arbitrary and they make no sense because next year that boy band is in, but those pants are out! It is important to understand that this is not at all how our creator God sees us. When God created humans, He said, " Let us make man in our image, after our likeness." - Genesis 1:27. Genesis is the first book in the Bible. God did not waste any time letting us know that we are made
special and good. " And God saw everything that He had made, and behold it was very good." -Genesis 1:31. Note : God didn't make you just okay, He made you very good.
1 Samuel 16:7 - "But the Lord said to Samuel, "Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him : For the Lord sees not as man sees : man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart." Doesn't this bible verse summarizes all the above stories very well? Just as God directed his prophet Samuel not to judge someone by how they look or how tall they are, He continues to teach us the same thing today.
Knowing that God doesn't care at all what we wear but looks at our hearts makes that a worthy standard for us to follow in our relationships. Let us resolve to look deeper and see what kind of character a person has before we choose them as a friend or before we choose them as a date. Also, if someone makes a nasty comment to you, we now can see how messed up that is, so don't let it bother you. Don't go along with kids who insist on teasing others or gossiping about them. Finally, resolve to see yourself the way God does, " You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you." - Song of Solomon 4:7.
* The names are changed, the stories are true.
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