Let’s Talk Turkey

Can we talk about some of the family drama that accompanies Thanksgiving? It really should be a wonderful time spent with family and friends but a lot of times feathers fly and I don’t mean from the turkey. Take Mia* for example, she had just completed her Wednesday, pre-Thanksgiving workout and was getting ready to go bake pie when a knock came at the door. She wasn’t expecting anyone. When she opened the door it was her daughter Blair*who Mia had not seen for fourteen years. 

Mia’s daughter Blair had left home when some pesky rules like no drugs, no sex in your parents homes and oh yeah, getting passing grades just made her know that she needed a fresh start. She reasoned that other Westchester County, New York parents allowed those things. I have a minor correction for Blair, most parents in Westchester County, New York would be okay with the sex and the drugs as long as you were a high academic achiever, oh and that if you got pregnant you got an abortion so as not to ruin your bright future.

In Blair’s mind and in order to justify her actions she concluded that she got thrown out of her house. Over the years, the words, I’m sorry mom and dad never escaped her lips. Nor, did she seem to connect with how actions may have consequences such as being asked to leave if you can not follow house rules. Although she claims faith in Jesus Christ, she never related to the story of the Prodigal Son, especially that part where he understands he deserves to be treated like the servants. And I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired servants- Luke 15:19. NO, Blair thinks her parents should treat her like nothing ever happened. Treat her like royalty even. What of her rebellion against God?

Then, there is Claudio*. Claudio, his wife, and kids are visiting his mom in Westchester County, New York for a week to celebrate Thanksgiving with her. His mom, Maggie* has some major issues to discuss with him such as fears over her declining health. In the past, Claudio has not been supportive of his mom except in extreme emergencies such as when she broke her arm a few years back and needed help after her surgery. On Facebook when he recounted the event, he was somehow the one suffering.

Claudio is planning on taking his kids to see New York City sites, visit old friends and drive the family, including his mother, to Philadelphia for a big old-fashioned Portuguese-American Thanksgiving. Only problem is, with Claudio it is all about having a good time, posting those special moments on Facebook despite the interpersonal relationship problems that have long existed between him and his mom. 

He has drawn clear boundary lines such as telling his mom that he is too busy with his career and his kids to babysit her. Anyway, “you’re still young mom, you will live to be 100!” Hey, way to go Claudio, what a great way to make himself feel better about abandoning your mom! 

Another person visiting her parents for the holidays is Morgan.* Morgan’s mother is beseeching God and trying to do everything within her power to stay well this holiday season because Thanksgiving and Christmas are the last times she may see her daughter for a long time. She wants to host her daughter and not lose one precious moment with her. If she should have to quarantine, due to that pesky virus or come down with the flu that has been going around she might even miss her daughter altogether. 

It’s only one holiday season, why is she so worried about it? That is because Morgan has informed her parents of her decision to enter a cloistered monastery after the holidays. During this year long Postulancy, she will live in a closed off world in earnest among nuns who have taken a vow of silence, poverty and chastity. Morgan’s telephone time will be restricted to two times a month and visits no more than two times per year. 

What do all these stories have in common? A few things. The parents of all of the above adult children are all saved, spirit-filled Christians.  Morgan, Blair,and Claudio once went to the same Church a long time ago. Claudio began attending that Church after he attended a bible study that a group of students ran. The transition to living on campus for Claudio was not easy. Naturally shy, he failed to make friends his first year at school. He repented for sins committed, professed Jesus Christ as his Savior and went on to attend a Bible-centered Church for many years.

Although Blair sailed through elementary school with no social or academic problems, high school was another story. She was struggling in her identity. She straddled the worlds of both Christianity and Westchester County New York progressive liberal society. As you may have guessed it was one or the other. Which would Blair choose? For a while there it looked like she was close to making a decision for the Lord, and then it happened!

The youth ministry kicked her when she was down. By down I mean down. Her parents were separated, her sister had psychiatric problems and she was struggling academically and socially in high school. She had migraines too. 

The church youth ministry announced an upcoming opportunity to be in a stage show. It would require Blair to memorize a monologue and attend weekly practice sessions with the youth group. It was probably the worse time for Blair to do this event considering the huge amount of school work that she already had to do, including SAT preparation classes. She really wanted to be part of this event and spent a lot of time writing and practicing a Christian monologue for the upcoming show. 

Every week she attended the youth group practices all the way up to the night of the performance. At the last minute the youth minister said she could not participate because she was not yet baptized. Blair was devastated. It was never the same between her and Jesus. As her mother drove her home that day, she told her that what had happened was not Jesus but part of the sin nature of humanity. But, can you blame Blair, she expected the church to represent Jesus?

As far as what represents Jesus, Morgan began to feel that instead of the risen Lord and the salvation status that this entailed, that she wanted to instead focus on the passion and death of Jesus. Maybe, even relive it daily. Where did she ever get such an icky idea? The cloistered nunnery of course. When I checked out their webpage and facebook page it shocked me. The morbid fascination with Jesus’ death instead of his glorious overcoming of death and sin seemed wrong to me. The website also seemed to contain a lot of drippy, teenage crush type talk about Jesus. 

How did Morgan get to this point? Her Father is an amazingly gifted teacher of the Bible. I know he taught her better than to believe that she can be a co-redemptive along with Jesus. The convents website made it quite clear that nuns could come alongside Mary and Jesus and gave undue importance to the nuns role in the redemptive process placing itself in direct opposition to what the Bible says. 

Did she desire to have what her father had? Did she covet his position in the church? Did she have the mistaken notion that somehow her father was Jesus Junior? I tend to think that was part of it. I also believe that she might be agoraphobic. Fear of being out in public and social anxiety appear to be another part of her attraction to a lifestyle that would mean that she would spend major parts of her day in total silence and have big restrictions on relationships outside of her cloistered convent. 

All three of the above Thanksgiving Day guests profess Christianity. All three of them went from a Jesus alone, Bible alone, salvation by faith church to churches that are more social justice seeking rather than biblical justice seeking. The Bible verse that comes to mind immediately when I think about where they are now has to be 2 Timothy 3:5 which states: Having a form of godliness, but denying the power therof: from such turn away! Blair, Claudio and Morgan all talked turkey and Jesus during this past holiday gathering but something was missing.They talked about all the volunteer work, and prayer that they do to make the world a better place. 

All three of them seem to be living with continuing ungodly behavior. The type of continuing in sin that marks a person as not a follower of Jesus. We need to honor our parents for example. The love Claudio, Blair and Morgan profess to have for their parents is undermined by the insensitive things that they constantly say and do. Maggie deals with loneliness and health problems, Claudio never seems to understand that his mother needs help but he always has times for others. Parents are part of God’s hierarchical structure for our lives and when you see a large-scale insensitivity to that, it means rebellion against God’s order. That is serious. It portents end time settings that are described in the Bible. Blair is a social justice warrior who couldn’t get past the entrée before bringing up racism, sustainability and her hatred of the status quo all while singing hymns to God and saying that some people have said she is a saint. People who don’t agree with her are toxic or have bad energy.

All three of these adult children are ferociously focused on bringing justice, coming alongside Jesus’ in praying and working for lost souls. None of them seem to be enamored with the Old Testament though. That is another clue into what’s going on with them. Let’s Talk Turkey. The New Testament is the completion of the Old Testament and together they make up everything that God wants us to know. The Old Testament is the foundation for the New Testament. It is like having a house without a foundation. It was the only scripture that Jesus read and it was good enough for him and he honored it as he went on to bring out the fuller meaning of it. Do not think that I have come to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I have not come to abolish them but to fulfill them-Matthew 5:17.

Claudio outright thought it best if his mother did not bring up the topic of the Old Testament in front of his  children. Wow. What about the covenants between God and man established there or promises made in the Old Testament that are only fulfilled in the New Testament. I liked reading the end of the book in high school when I didn’t have time to read all my assignments but, let’s face it, Shakespeare halfway is no way. Blair has made God into anything she wants him to be and he is hardly recognizable when she mixes him in with the laws of attraction and other such nonsense. Morgan’s parents Thanksgiving holiday consisted of crying their eyes out and trying to help her sell her condominium and sell all her possessions before entering the convent. She even has to get rid of her 401(K). I can’t believe the Catholic Church would ask her to do that. 

Let’s Talk Turkey: Is there any hope for this next generation? For the first time in my life, I am not sure. After all the Bible says people will fall away, so why am I surprised that Blair, Claudio and Morgan have fallen away from where they once were with Jesus? Now the brother shall betray the brother to death, and the father the son; and children shall rise up against their parents, and shall cause them to be put to death-Mark13:12.

Are those times here? We live in a cancel culture where you can be denounced when you do not go along with the popular theories of the time. Though things seem bad lately, I pray for individuals such as Blair, Claudio and Morgan to change the direction of their lives. I pray that they repent, place their faith in the Jesus of the Bible and be heirs to his eternal legacy. 

* The stories are all too true so, the names have been changed for privacy. Please note that there would be an accent over the A in Claudio only this keyboard doesn’t do it.